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17. Walk upright

“What in the name of [blank] are you doing?”

“Errmm… walking.”

“Looks weird.”

“You do know that you’re crawling right?”

Haha, look... yeah, it's not that fun.

Don’t you just hate people that crawl around every day. Screaming and shouting without making any sense… and also they crap their pants. I’m talking of course about children… or more likely, infants.

Well it’s okay to crawl when you’re a small child… a really small child, but when you grow older it’s just silly to crawl. Imagine how the world would look if everybody crawl instead. The shelf making companies would be out of business, that’s for sure.

He's coming to get you.

Try instead to use your two hind legs and stand on them. Then have your front legs (or arms, if you would like to call them that) in a pendular motion as such: right leg – left arm, left leg – right arm. Try to look up and not at your feet and if you are doing this at the same time then congratulations, you are now walking upright… probably.

So if you’re an infant… don’t worry your just “normal”… but we will dislike you for being it sometimes. 

Images from here and here.